I’d like to sound all-seeing, all knowing, and say that what I started in 1974 had a very intentional outcome, but that would be far from the truth. I’m thinking about this now, as my parents approach their 75th anniversary, and this all started as we were leading up to their 25th – 50 long years ago. So much has happened, so much is different, but my parents are getting ready for another landmark celebration.

A long time ago before I was all-consumed by genealogy, I used to do a lot of embroidery, crewel, and needlepoint. My parents’ 25th anniversary was going to be celebrated with a surprise party, and I wanted to give them a special gift. The gift I decided on turned out to be something that surpassed any of my original intentions.

I embroidered a table cloth for my parents to use on holidays when we were all together. It had symbols of Jewish holidays, and it took long hours over many months to create. They were thrilled with the gift and put it to use immediately. I don’t remember what was said or who said it, but my response was that they should treat it gently because another one wouldn’t be forthcoming until their 50th anniversary. By the way, to this day, my parents still use that original cloth, and it is in pretty pristine condition.

About 15 years later, I decided on the theme for the new tablecloth. Looking back, I can’t figure out if it was the most brilliant or the dumbest idea I’ve ever had. It has taken hundreds of hours over many years to create. For the next holiday when the family would all be together, I purchased a huge, banquet size tablecloth and came equipped with markers. I asked everyone to sign their names. I wrote the date, the place, and the occasion on the side of the tablecloth and chose a color. Everyone’s name would be embroidered in that color. Each year and each event would have a different color. I am really grateful for the wide range of colors available in embroidery threads.

As the years went by, we continued to sign. Sometimes I barely finished embroidering the signatures before it was time to get the tablecloth signed again. In 2009 (10 years after I intended) this was to be my parents’ gift at a 60th anniversary party and the hordes who attended were invited to sign it. It took several years before I finished. My parents didn’t want to take it home – their house was no longer large enough for the growing numbers of grandchildren and spouses. It remained packed away.

This year, to my surprise, my niece in whose house the tablecloth was living in a box, brought it to the family seder. My nieces and nephews had so many questions about who people were whose names were on the tablecloth and whose names they saw on our family tree. Many of them were babies the last time we had the cloth out. There was a whole new generation who had never seen it and with whom we could share events and memories. There are signatures on the tablecloth of cherished relatives who, in the years since they signed, had died; old friends who moved away; relationships that were no longer. While I was embroidering the last of the names, 13 years ago, I ironed and glued decals to cover the worst of the stains and I had chosen those decals to reflect things people were interested in.

A family decision was made for this traveling tablecloth, to start signing it again and do so as long as room remained on it. This is the unintended legacy – a visual way to enhance holidays and family celebrations, a lead-in to the stories of the family. As I said, an unintended legacy.